CHAPTER NINE

A few weeks went by, and everything I planned was going smoothly, from building renovations to endless fun with Selim. Slowly, I was starting to feel comfortable with our relationship, without feeling guilty or unfaithful. I made a choice to be happy and to find love again, and he of all people deserved my genuine feelings. His outgoing personality reflected the best in me, and for that I was thankful.

On the other hand, my mother gave into my life-changing decision with no choice but to wish me well. She loved me more than she could ever explain. I knew and understood that, as well as her maternal fears, but at some point she had to learn to let go of me and allow me to find my way.

Uncle Hakan was always busy. We didn’t get to spend a lot of time together. His hotel was a success and always over-booked. Conference meetings and wedding receptions were the highlight of the spring and summer season in Istanbul, which kept him occupied.

Meanwhile, Nuran and I spend long hours planning my future institute. Her experienced background was as impressive as Selim claimed. With each passing day, we got to learn a little more about each other. For instance, she was the oldest of her siblings, with a responsibility to support her mother, especially after her father’s passing. She had to step up into the big world of hard work, expenses, and necessities to ensure her family’s future. Therefore, she had a tough skin, moved around a lot in her line of work, and met many resourceful people.

Although she didn’t meet the right person to spend the rest of her life with, before, her relationship with Kenan was progressing. They seemed to understand each other, which kind of bothered me a little. Not because I had romantic interests in him still, but because I had doubts that he would eventually break her heart like he did mine. She seemed like a nice person full of life and dreams, which somehow reminded me of the old me. Fearless for all adventures.

In the blink of an eye, time went by so quickly, leading me to Selim’s birthday. The special date was circled in red on my personal agenda, calling for a special celebration. I had big ideas to celebrate the happy occasion, as I planned a surprise party for him at my uncle’s hotel. His family flew to Istanbul, along with his friends and former colleagues. Nuran was very helpful planning with me the evening of surprise. They had lots of mutual friends, which made the invitation process a lot easier.

Though Selim was under the impression that we were going out to dinner, just the two of us, once we got to the hotel restaurant, all guests came from behind the planned scene at once shouting “Surprise!” His jaw dropped with amusement, not expecting such a stunt. I fooled him well, yet in a nice way.

The opening song was for us to enjoy alone. His charming looks were targeting my eyes the whole night. The music was romantic, and so was the dancing. He had a hidden talent of sexy moves he didn’t unleash until now, which brought my face an exceptional smile. 

Soon, everyone else joined the dance floor to share our moment of celebration, including Kenan and Nuran. They were happy swinging within each other’s arms as I turned my head away, ignoring their charisma to better enjoy mine.

Bubbly drinks were passing by us back and forth, keeping our minds entertained with an alcoholic touch, while Selim was having a blast catching up with old friends and family. I looked away for a moment to locate my missing mother, when I caught a glimpse of her standing outside, overlooking the bright city. I approached her to check the matter, only to find her standing with Kenan and my uncle. Upon seeing me, they stopped talking at once, and the look on their faces seemed somewhat tense.

“What’s going on?” I wondered, looking at my mother.

“Nothing, dear,” She smiled back with a tear in her eye, ready to escape.

“We were just talking about Melek’s case,” Uncle Hakan replied, coughing for a split second. His face turned pale.

“Is there anything new that I should know?”

“No,” Kenan replied, ending the conversation point blank. He was acting so strangely I felt, and so was everyone else. “Now, if you’d all excuse me, I must find Nuran.” He smiled, looking directly at me, and then left.

“I have to check on the guests, too.” Uncle Hakan said, before walking away, leaving my mother and me for a moment alone.

“Mother? Are you okay?”

“Yes, dear. I’m fine.” She smiled. I walked up to her and touched her hands; they felt cold. “Your hands are freezing.”

“There’s a mild breeze out here. Why don’t we go back inside? Selim must be looking for you. It’s almost time to cut the cake!” Her happy smile did not at all convince me of her delighted mood. Something was clearly bothering her. I sensed it from a mile away, yet I had no clue nor did I want to start a new interrogation on such special night.

“Sure. Let’s go.” I walked her back inside, hoping for the best.

Inside the cozy atmosphere of Selim’s birthday party, I regained my cheerful spirit once again when the cake was wheeled down the red carpet for all to enjoy at once.

“Happy birthday, Selim!” I excitedly said, exchanging a kiss on the cheek, watching him blow out the candles. Loud applause of best wishes poured in with a blessing of such happy gathering.

My present was the first one he got to open. A classy watch to suit his style, yet in a way to remind him of the good timing that brought us together in the first place, the time that changed everything for both of us. Family and friends soon gathered to congratulate the grown man of the hour, before he took a moment out of his busy night to thank everyone for coming.

“Thank you all for coming tonight. You’ve done well. I was very surprised.” He laughed, and so did everyone. “A special thanks to Bahar, the special lady in my life who made all this possible.” He turned around and held my hands, with everybody looking back at us. “Tonight was an exceptional night for me to celebrate, in which I had my own surprise for you. But now that our family and friends are all here with us, there is no point to postpone what I’ve planned to say.” He smiled, looking straight into my eyes. I swallowed with difficulty, sensing fear.

“A surprise for me? What surprise?” I wondered, trying to prepare myself for the worst scenario possible. Everyone’s eyes were on me, causing me a great deal of anxiety.

“I love you, Bahar, I love you very much. More than I ever thought I would. I love you like there’s no tomorrow.” My hands were sweating, and I was suddenly uncomfortable with him expressing his love in the presence of all these people. Yet I had no proper way to stop him from talking.

“Bahar? Will you marry me?” He stood before me holding an engagement ring, causing my heart to pound out of order. My eyes filled up with tears of surprise and discomfort as I stood there in silence, not knowing what to say. The distressful moment of his proposal brought me back in time and to a place I never pictured myself being ever again. Feeling a greater pressure surrounding me, I took a deep breath to answer back.

“Yes, Selim. I will marry you.” I smiled with pain when he pulled me closer to his heart. Another round of applause poured in. I looked Kenan’s way, only to have seen him drowning in a moment of blank. Perhaps he was as surprised as I was.

A birthday celebration was soon turned into an engagement event I did not see coming. Though I was happy to go home that night with a ring on my finger, there was something special missing in my heart. The spark of the proposal was taken by the surprise, or perhaps by the dozen eyes that were pointing in my direction. Selim’s romantic speech was overwhelming for some reason. Every woman’s dream is to encounter her Prince Charming, but my having walked that same path before stole away the excitement.

“Be careful what you wish for” is a true testament of warning, set to alert us or any element of surprise heading in our direction. When we least expect it, and with an ambush of surprise in one hand and no self-preparation in the other, we find it difficult to wrap all events in the same picture. Keeping in mind our great desire to move forward, we shall always be aware of our wish’s sudden presence and the possibility of it becoming true.